His perspective is the default because he's right!
"So none of them should learn how, just because most don't want to?" He challenges, though that's not exactly what Inigo said, and the difference soars past him unnoticed. It just doesn't even cross his mind that there wouldn't be children who want to learn to fight. It's something that he's dreamed of his entire life. It's in his blood.
"Tch. Maybe I just think that you shouldn't go around telling children to forget about their dreams. If they want to learn to fight, then encourage them. Don't make them feel like their effort is meaningless."
"It's not like I told them they couldn't fight at all!" Inigo says, moving up his hands into the air, almost like Fang Duobing is holding a gun to his head, rather than just his sharp tongue. "I just told them that I wasn't going to fight them!"
There's a difference there! Even Inigo, who often doubts his own judgment, knows that there's a difference there. Sure, maybe he would have told those kids not to fight if he had lingered around to talk to them for longer, but he wasn't really eager to stick around a bunch of aggressive kids, his own housemate included..
He opens and closes his mouth a few times, like he isn't sure what to even say in the face of Fang Duobing's weird intensity.
But saying nothing about it - just letting it pass - feels weird too, especially at this point.
"Seriously, is this some personal thing for you?" It's got to be, right? Fang Duobing might get a little worked up about stuff from time to time, but this feels way more intense than the usual to Inigo.
"Is it one for you?" he shoots back, brows lifted and tone accusing-- but he relents after only a second or two. Heis being unusually dogged about this... And it's not like the reasons for his strong feelings aren't personal. Inigo already has his hands up in defense; he doesn't want to back the other boy into a corner.
"...Sorry. It's a little personal." He concedes that much, looking away for something else to focus on. Oh, right. Wasn't he fixing some snacks?... He uses that as an excuse to disengage from the tension as he goes to the counter where he cut up some pears and fetches a plate of those.
"Here." He sets the plate at the table and then takes a seat himself. It's just... A little awkward to talk about this. That's all.
"I wasn't always as talented as I am now, you know. I had my share of difficulties being taken seriously."
Well, that makes things make a whole lot more sense here.
Not that Fang Duobing can't be a little intense about stuff from time to time, but this certainly was on a new level entirely. This being something personal to him explains the reaction, and Inigo can already kind of see what the other is getting at just with the very brief summary Fang Duobing gives.
It's not a sentiment fully foreign to Inigo either, but considering he has actively tried to present himself as someone who is not meant to be taken seriously in the first place, he doesn't find himself caring as much about it as Fang Duobing seems to.
He frowns a little bit. Not angry, but just-- concerned for his friend.
"Why wouldn't they take you seriously? Even if you may not have been as talented before, you're still an extremely driven and passionate person by nature!" Unless Fang Duobing has truly changed at some point before Inigo got to know him - but he really can't imagine the other any other way. It's how he can say this so naturally, practically instinctively. "Isn't that worth being taken seriously?"
It's not something that he talks about often. It's not relevant to his life now, to look back on his childhood years and reminisce about his difficulties. Why would anyone need to know that Fang Duobing used to be wheelchair-bound, that he had been so ill that his mother feared to even name him until he was five.
But Inigo is asking, and maybe it's something worthwhile to tell, so they can understand one another a little better.
"I was born sickly. When I was a child, I couldn't even walk. My... My uncle tried to teach me swordplay, but he was impatient and grew frustrated every time I couldn't hold a sword." That's not the truth of the relationship, but what else could he do but gloss over the fact that it was his father. The full story was much too complicated for one sitting, and this much is enough to tell already.
"My mother tried to console me by saying that I didn't need to learn, she would take care of me. No one could understand my frustrations, that I wanted to learn but I couldn't make my frail body hold a sword meant for someone who could stand."
"Then... Someone else came along and offered me a small wooden sword." He obfuscates again, this time out of respect for Li Lianhua and his secrets. It doesn't matter much, when Inigo doesn't know his name regardless. "He told me that if I could learn to swing it, he would train me. He didn't berate my shortcomings or make excuses for my inability. It was simple, straightforward; and most importantly, it was just like anyone else. With that lighter sword, I was able to make real progress for once."
"I could credit my determination to him. I still put in the work, even when it was painful, but he gave me hope that it could amount to something, that what I wanted wasn't out of reach."
It's.. a difficult feeling. On the one hand, Inigo can absolutely understand why Fang Duobing had wanted to pick up a sword so badly. It makes sense. He can't be sure what he would have been doing or wanting in that situation, but of course Fang Duobing needed something to take him out of that miserable situation with all those people looking down on him. It makes his insisting on letting the kids here fight make all the sense in the world.
.. on the other hand, there's still that nauseating feeling in the pit of Inigo's stomach when he thinks about how little he had wanted to pick up a sword, and yet it has been there in his hand so often.
He swallows the feeling. Even if it's difficult, he wants to focus on his friend right now. It's not strange for Fang Duobing to talk, but this is certainly the most vulnerable thing he's ever shared with Inigo, and he wants to make sure to honor that.
"I see what you're getting at now," he says, giving the other a gentle smile. "It's kind of you to want to look out for those kids and make sure they never have to feel like they aren't good enough."
It is the most vulnerable that Fang Duobing has been with him--save perhaps for the sharing of their wishes that had been foisted upon them. This feels... both easier and more difficult, partly because he can decide how much to tell and partly because he still has to be the one to tell it. He nods a little to Inigo's smile and his gentle words, his usual buoyance subdued into thoughtfulness.
"...It's not just about fighting, though. For me it's what I aspire to, and maybe for this child you encountered, it's also his dream." It certainly sounds like it is, but there's something about Inigo's push-back from before that he still wants to make clear. "But everyone should have a chance to chase their ideals as far as their ability allows them. I think that's true of all aspirations, so long as they don't cause harm. If you have something else that you dream of, you should be just as free to pursue it."
Inigo's gaze drops for a moment - not necessarily looking sad, but mostly just kind of shy in that way Inigo sometimes does.
There's still some sadness and even more complicated feelings, but he's shoving those down as far as he can, letting out a shy little laugh before he manages to turn his gaze back to his friend.
"Is that still your dream, then?"
Does Inigo realize Fang Duobing was turning this towards him? Of course. But that's why he's pushing it back towards the other so quickly. As long as Fang Duobing doesn't look too awkward about having to be vulnerable, then it's fine - Inigo wouldn't turn it back to him if it felt too delicate. But it's nice to hear Fang Duobing speak of himself, and Inigo really does not want to think about his own dreams and all the nauseating feelings that brings.
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no subject
"So none of them should learn how, just because most don't want to?" He challenges, though that's not exactly what Inigo said, and the difference soars past him unnoticed. It just doesn't even cross his mind that there wouldn't be children who want to learn to fight. It's something that he's dreamed of his entire life. It's in his blood.
"Tch. Maybe I just think that you shouldn't go around telling children to forget about their dreams. If they want to learn to fight, then encourage them. Don't make them feel like their effort is meaningless."
no subject
There's a difference there! Even Inigo, who often doubts his own judgment, knows that there's a difference there. Sure, maybe he would have told those kids not to fight if he had lingered around to talk to them for longer, but he wasn't really eager to stick around a bunch of aggressive kids, his own housemate included..
He opens and closes his mouth a few times, like he isn't sure what to even say in the face of Fang Duobing's weird intensity.
But saying nothing about it - just letting it pass - feels weird too, especially at this point.
"Seriously, is this some personal thing for you?" It's got to be, right? Fang Duobing might get a little worked up about stuff from time to time, but this feels way more intense than the usual to Inigo.
no subject
"...Sorry. It's a little personal." He concedes that much, looking away for something else to focus on. Oh, right. Wasn't he fixing some snacks?... He uses that as an excuse to disengage from the tension as he goes to the counter where he cut up some pears and fetches a plate of those.
"Here." He sets the plate at the table and then takes a seat himself. It's just... A little awkward to talk about this. That's all.
"I wasn't always as talented as I am now, you know. I had my share of difficulties being taken seriously."
no subject
Not that Fang Duobing can't be a little intense about stuff from time to time, but this certainly was on a new level entirely. This being something personal to him explains the reaction, and Inigo can already kind of see what the other is getting at just with the very brief summary Fang Duobing gives.
It's not a sentiment fully foreign to Inigo either, but considering he has actively tried to present himself as someone who is not meant to be taken seriously in the first place, he doesn't find himself caring as much about it as Fang Duobing seems to.
He frowns a little bit. Not angry, but just-- concerned for his friend.
"Why wouldn't they take you seriously? Even if you may not have been as talented before, you're still an extremely driven and passionate person by nature!" Unless Fang Duobing has truly changed at some point before Inigo got to know him - but he really can't imagine the other any other way. It's how he can say this so naturally, practically instinctively. "Isn't that worth being taken seriously?"
no subject
But Inigo is asking, and maybe it's something worthwhile to tell, so they can understand one another a little better.
"I was born sickly. When I was a child, I couldn't even walk. My... My uncle tried to teach me swordplay, but he was impatient and grew frustrated every time I couldn't hold a sword." That's not the truth of the relationship, but what else could he do but gloss over the fact that it was his father. The full story was much too complicated for one sitting, and this much is enough to tell already.
"My mother tried to console me by saying that I didn't need to learn, she would take care of me. No one could understand my frustrations, that I wanted to learn but I couldn't make my frail body hold a sword meant for someone who could stand."
"Then... Someone else came along and offered me a small wooden sword." He obfuscates again, this time out of respect for Li Lianhua and his secrets. It doesn't matter much, when Inigo doesn't know his name regardless. "He told me that if I could learn to swing it, he would train me. He didn't berate my shortcomings or make excuses for my inability. It was simple, straightforward; and most importantly, it was just like anyone else. With that lighter sword, I was able to make real progress for once."
"I could credit my determination to him. I still put in the work, even when it was painful, but he gave me hope that it could amount to something, that what I wanted wasn't out of reach."
no subject
.. on the other hand, there's still that nauseating feeling in the pit of Inigo's stomach when he thinks about how little he had wanted to pick up a sword, and yet it has been there in his hand so often.
He swallows the feeling. Even if it's difficult, he wants to focus on his friend right now. It's not strange for Fang Duobing to talk, but this is certainly the most vulnerable thing he's ever shared with Inigo, and he wants to make sure to honor that.
"I see what you're getting at now," he says, giving the other a gentle smile. "It's kind of you to want to look out for those kids and make sure they never have to feel like they aren't good enough."
no subject
"...It's not just about fighting, though. For me it's what I aspire to, and maybe for this child you encountered, it's also his dream." It certainly sounds like it is, but there's something about Inigo's push-back from before that he still wants to make clear. "But everyone should have a chance to chase their ideals as far as their ability allows them. I think that's true of all aspirations, so long as they don't cause harm. If you have something else that you dream of, you should be just as free to pursue it."
no subject
There's still some sadness and even more complicated feelings, but he's shoving those down as far as he can, letting out a shy little laugh before he manages to turn his gaze back to his friend.
"Is that still your dream, then?"
Does Inigo realize Fang Duobing was turning this towards him? Of course. But that's why he's pushing it back towards the other so quickly. As long as Fang Duobing doesn't look too awkward about having to be vulnerable, then it's fine - Inigo wouldn't turn it back to him if it felt too delicate. But it's nice to hear Fang Duobing speak of himself, and Inigo really does not want to think about his own dreams and all the nauseating feelings that brings.